Commentary Life and Imperfections

Let us think once about whether the words we have unintentionally uttered or the actions we have carelessly taken have hurt others, just as a frog struck by a stone casually thrown by people wanders on the brink of death, and let us open a hopeful tomorrow. Just as the teaching tells us to become a person who grows ripe as time passes, rather than a person who simply grows old, let us live a life that is positive and vibrant, and a life without regrets. Humans always live with longing and regret. At the moment of death, it is said that people regret most, thinking "I should not have lived that way."

Where can a life without longing and regret exist, and where can a tree exist that does not endure wind, rain, and snowstorms? Yet since life has model answers but not absolute truths, it seems that contradictions, conflicts, and regrets are inevitable.

To live a life without regrets, if we look only at good things, think only of good things, hold good hearts, have consideration for others, and do not greedily covet too many things, our minds will become at ease and regrets will diminish.

Master Dosan Ahn Chang-ho said that both angular and rounded stones have their uses, and that it is not right to criticize others just because their thoughts differ from one's own. A Jewish proverb also says to live each day as if it were both the first day and the last day of your life.

When things go wrong, many people try to find fault in others. When a child causes problems at school, parents try to find the cause in the teacher's mistakes or another child. While people pursue others for their mistakes, they hope for a generous understanding of their own faults.

Young men and women have married for love, but the surge in divorces is due to acting self-centeredly rather than compromising and considering others. In today's world, self-love is excessively strong. If we compare life to a table of rice with various side dishes including bitter ones, modern people are too fond of sweet side dishes.

Just as the saying goes that high mountains have deep valleys, behind the convenience brought by materialism lie many side effects. While the level of knowledge has risen, common sense and moral judgment are sorely lacking, and the human society is overshadowed by the dark shadow of dehumanization.

Everyone has not only strengths but also weaknesses and flaws. Those who pursue perfection are often afraid of revealing their weaknesses or flaws. However, having no weaknesses or flaws can be said to mean lacking human charm. This is seen in the paradox that human greatness lies in incompleteness.

While there are degrees of difference from person to person, everyone has some pretense and vulnerabilities. Pretense is when a person acts as if they have abilities they do not actually possess, while vulnerabilities refer to the shortcomings a person ordinarily has. Pretense means a person does not know they are lacking, but vulnerabilities mean a person is aware of their insufficiencies. Rather than being ashamed of vulnerabilities, if we understand them well, they can become a means to build relationships with others. People who are perfect in everything are easily subject to jealousy and become targets of attack from others, but when someone reveals certain vulnerabilities, people do not feel burdened and approach them comfortably.

Interpersonal relationships are similar to the principle of a spring. The more one tries to assert superiority over the other, the greater the resistance, and the more one pursues one's own interests, the more distant the relationship becomes.

Even beautiful women have flaws. In fact, when flaws harmonize well with beauty, they appear more beautiful. Is not Leonardo da Vinci's world-renowned masterpiece Mona Lisa a beautiful woman without eyebrows?

Acknowledging flaws paradoxically brings us many things. To allow the other person to enter into me, one must not close the door of flaws but keep it open to a reasonable degree.